Middle age — the sequel we have been building up to all of our lives

We’ve got it wrong — really wrong. This whole ageing boll*cks. It’s not about turning the clock back, stopping the wrinkles, artificially enhancing the tits, arse, mouth (or any other orifice for that matter), avoiding or lying about the birthdays, or binning our sexuality because some tw*t somewhere, said we were past our sell by date.