Ladies, get out there and show the world what a real woman looks like

This is me the other night going for a belated wedding anniversary dinner with my lovely husband — we’ve been married for 15 years now, after a whirlwind romance that started 10 months before we tied the knot.

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During that time, I’ve had 3 children, suffered from depression numerous times, given up a career, put on 2.5 stone in weight, accumulated a significant number of wrinkles and grey hair, gone up 4 bra sizes, lost my battle with gravity and entered an early and fairly severe menopause.

I’m not particularly high maintenance from a beauty perspective — I don’t have facials or fillers, I shave my legs (well sometimes ), paint my own nails, pluck my own eyebrows, very often dye my own hair and yes do succumb to St Tropez false tan, as quite honestly, my fat always look better tanned.

I normally use whatever nice skincare products are on offer at TK Tatt (aka TK Maxx), drink sh*t loads of wine and gin and frequently go to bed with my make up on, if indeed I can be bothered to wear any, as I’m too lazy to take it of.

And as the years have gone by, I have chosen not to fade into the background, wear more conservative outfits, or hide my wobbly belly on the beach.

No, I decided to be bolder and louder.

Because age should not and will not diminish my femininity, sexuality or presence. It brings wisdom, experience and confidence. It is to be embraced, enjoyed and shared.

The narrative surrounding beauty and ageing in our society is total bullsh*t. The airbrushed magazines, the supposed role models of middle aged women virtually starving themselves to stay thin, despite our biology needing some extra pounds and the constant rhetoric that only equates beauty or sexual attractiveness with being younger.

Well let me say this loud and clear. Ageing does not diminish a woman’s beauty, sexuality or place in this world — it expands it.

So, ladies, take your place, use your voice, embrace your body, heart and soul and get out there and show the world what a real woman actually looks like.

Because the world needs to see you, in all of your glory, with all of your imperfections, in order to banish the bullsh*t and empower women to be all that they can.

A bit about me: I aspire to inspire people to be themselves, to embrace all of themselves, warts and all. To re-define our reality, to be more honest and sustainable. To re-define success, to be more diverse and focus on the stuff that really matters, not the shiny sh•t, that you cannot take with you anyway.

No-one will remember what car you drove, but my goodness, they will remember if you made them smile, feel good about themselves and accepted them for who they are. It is the gifts of kindness and understanding that will last beyond your lifetime, not the gifts of gold.

I’m a mum, writer, transformation consultant and all round eccentric, doing my own thing, in my own way, in the hope I can make others smile and love themselves a little bit more.

My blog, library of curiosity, daily inspiration and lots of other things, can be found on my website

My alternative and eclectic approach to fashion and design can be found at

I love people, I love life and I love to talk, so please feel free to reach out and let’s have a conversation.

With love

Nik x

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